THE WEAKNESS IN ME

I'm not the sort of person who falls in and quickly out of love
But to you I gave my affection right from the start
I have a lover who loves me, how could I break such a heart
Yet still you get my attention

Why do you come here when you know I've got troubles enough
Why do you call me when you know I can't answer the phone
Make me lie when I don't want to
And make someone else some kind of unknowing fool
You make me stay when I should not
Are you so strong or is all the weakness in me
Why do you come here and pretend to be just passing by
But I mean to see you
And I mean to hold you, tightly

Feeling guilty, worried, waking from tormented sleep
This old love has me bound but the new love cuts deep
If I choose now, I'll lose out, one of you has to fall
And I need you, and you

Why do you come here when you know I've got troubles enough
Why do you call me when you know I can't answer the phone
Make me lie when I don't want to
And make someone else some kind of unknowing fool
You make me stay when I should not
Are you so strong or is all the weakness in me
Why do you come here and pretend to be just passing by
But I mean to see you
And I mean to hold you, tightly

wala lang. natuwa lang ako cos pati sa friendster may It's complicated status na.. is that not a sign? haaayy. it's really weird kasi kahit complicated yung situation namin, i'm happy.. happy ako. kasi that's how he makes me feel eh.

kay went to my place last night.. kwentuhan galore kasi one week yata kami di nagkita.. and i told her about the recent events between me and him. and the only advice she gave me is to go with the flow.. and that's exactly what i'm doing.. go with the flow lang.. i'm not letting myself fall so deep kasi ayoko din masaktan nman ulet. na-traumatize na yata tlga kasi ako eh.. kaya ini-enjoy ko lang all the time i get to be with him.. ang weird ng situation namin, sobra! i can't even explain it.. inexplicable! bsta.. basta.

gid and i are texting right now. ewan ko ba. no matter how bad things have been between us two, we ALWAYS end up listening to each other's problems pa din.. siya na nga mismo nagsabi eh, after all that has happened, di mawala yung connection namin.. weird, sa totoo lang.

nag-check ako ng multiply kanina. i was surprised to find out na yung nixxielicious na friend ko dun is someone else i don't even know. i thought kasi si nix yun, an old acquaintance.. but NO, bestfriend pala ni *****.. nainis lang ako kasi bakit pati multiply ko db?! tss.. ewan ko ba. whatever.

i'm still in school. wala na nman gngawa cos tapos na lahat. but i don't feel like going home.. la din kasi nman tlga gagawin. dito muna ko school with friends, nakikipagkulitan lang. late pa din nman pasok ko tomorrow eh, 4:20 pa.. [isay's singing right now behind me.. heheh.]

ivan just texted.. ei let's party with no reason @ grilla, rockwell this friday. 8:30 pm. heheh. trip eh noh?! ivan tlga oh, mga plano.. that would be fun sana but i don't think i could come. eh kasi birthday party ni punkie on saturday night naman.. two straight nights na fun and parties? i don't think papayagan din ako.. dadi pa! sayang nga eh, kf texted the other night kasi.. volleyball daw kami sa bf resort on saturday. i can't go din kasi may shoot nman kami on saturday, morning til hapon.. lapit na kasi finals.. busy na nman.

online enrolment na tomorrow. second to the last term ko na [hopefully, i'm still keeping my fingers crossed]. magulong ayusan na nman ng sched 'to.. haay.

AUTOBIOGRAPHY. this has been haunting me na tlga. wala pa akong concept.. wala akong maisip. or if meron man, ang hirap gawin.. cos i'll be needing a lot of talents and that'll be difficult kasi xmpre, mahirap i-stage. nako. patay na tlga ko. bahala na.